Sooner or Later…

Little Missey is growing closer to being able to eat solid foods meaning the label reading has begun.  Did you know that Gerber baby cereals have soy in the ingredient list?  Neither did I.  In discussing the senselessness of adding soy to plain cereal a ‘so what’ entered the conversation.  Explanations followed but it wasn’t hard to see the ‘so what’ was an attitude and not just a comment.  Sadly, others have said that this is a common occurrence in words and deeds toward people with food allergies or restrictions. 

People without food allergies or restrictions don’t understand.  Why should they?  People live through their own experiences and most have never had to be vigilant with food.  The school experience has taught that everyone should eat a healthy diet and exercise to remain strong and healthy.  But *should* is so relevant, so personal, so nonjudgmental, so enabling.  Result - they cheat.  A little here, a little there after all what’s the worst that can happen? A few ounces here and a few ounces there to one day look in the mirror and discover the mirror person is fat.  But that isn’t so bad.  Not really.  Everyone expects to gain weight as they age so fat isn’t bad.  Buy new larger clothes, take the elevator instead of the stairs, lie and blame it on the baby.  Not bad at all.  Why should your food allergy/restrictions be any different?

There is a difference.  For some it is means allergic reactions.  Death by strangulation isn’t pretty.  It is less pretty when it is your body choking life away from the inside.  No old lady with an umbrella can chase away that boogeyman.  The knight in shining armour is yourself and your sword an epipen.  How many carry a sword today?

For others results are more long term.  Their difference is mental retardation.  The facts sound so simple:  Soy inhibits the absorption of thyroid hormone.  Lack of thyroid hormone leads to mental retardation.  If lack of thyroid hormone leads to mental retardation then avoid soy products to avoid mental retardation.   Homework:  read labels, learn the disguises that soy hides under and find products or recipes that are safe.  Simple isn’t it? 

Parents of all children share the same fear of trying to keep their baby-child safe until the child becomes mature enough to recognize danger.  Parents are vigilant knowing that the day will come when the child becomes an adult able to protect themselves and their job is finished.  For the parents of mentally handicapped children this day never comes.  Their fears are never ending. Their little lambs remain forever lambs in a world full of wolves.

Can you see the irony, the frustration, the idiocy of it all?  It isn’t about just a little bit never hurt anyone.  Not about what you don’t know won’t hurt you because it is all in your head.  Not about YOU.

It is about doing what must be done.

I am not asking you to do my job for me.  It is my job to learn what can and can not be eaten.  It is my job to control myself and do what must be done.  It is my job to protect my child until the day the child can protect herself.  It is my job to teach her what must be done.  It is my job to train her to do the job herself.

I am asking you to do your job.  I am asking you to be honest.  If I ask about a food, please tell me the truth.  I don’t know or I forgot or I didn’t want to be bothered even it is too much trouble is the truth.  I can handle the truth.  We may never eat at your house again but we can handle that fact.  Can you?

If you won’t do your job then perhaps it is time to go our separate ways.

“A mind is a terrible thing to waste.”

Especially when it is not yours to waste.